Thursday, June 2, 2011

Ani asaach tu barsat rahaa ....

आणि अशाच एका संध्याकाळी तो बरसत आला,
अन पृथ्वीला छान न्हाहू घालून गेला

छान मातीच्या उटण्याचा सुगंध हवेत दरवळला 
गरम हवेत कसा काय हा गारवा छान विरघळला

 
मातीत चिमुकल्या पावलांचे ठसे,
चिंध्या झालेल्या ओल्या कागदांनी भरलेले खिसे

घराकडे गडबडून धावणाऱ्या काही आया,
निसर्गाची न संपणारी ही ओढाळ माया 

भिजून गेलेली काही पाखरं
आडोशा शोधणारी कुत्री मांजरं

चार टपोरे थेंब चेहऱ्याला स्पर्श करत
पार पोहोचवतं मनाला क्षितिजावर
 
आकाशातल्या रंग-बेरंगी छटा
वाऱ्याने कुरवळलेल्या हिरव्या गार बटा

देत रहा अशाच प्रेमळ भेटी गाठी,
तुझ्या रूपातून स्पर्शणाऱ्या प्रेमापोटी !!

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

A lesson

In this strange world,
unexpected occurs

I plan something
and I get nothing

Nothing but frustrations
Nothing but a regret

I fall down
and look at the world with frown

As if someone pushed me...
Wasn't it my desicion to act freely?

So, I learn,
Learn to keep going

Not dwelling,
I move on

To rely on practicality
I get a reason to hang on...

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

raat ...

एक बार एक रातने सुबह से कूच खास मांग लिया 
अपना गेहरापन देकर थोडा वक्त मांग लिया

रात बीती नही थी अब तक ठीक से
गुजरते हुये थंडे झोंकेसे थोडा इंतेजार मांग लिया

ठेहरी थी रात यूही कभी नदी किनारे
पानी में टाकते चांद से घना अंधेरा मांग लिया

रातरानी फैलाती अपनी खुशबू चारो दिशाओमे,
इस धुंद हवाओसे थोडा नशा मांग लिया 
रात कि गेहरी खामोशी पढने के लिये 
उजाला नाही अंधेरा मांग लिया....


Wednesday, May 25, 2011

an unexpected end...and unwanted one...


Will miss you baby 
Only for you -

It was the first time, I held you n my palms
Delighted enough to see you, and I felt to calm

Before even I could taste the happiness,
Doctor said sorry she can't walk,
I had butterflies in my stomach
For a minute, I lost ability to talk

"Why you of all" I looked at you and cogitated,
It felt like full stop after the dreams for which I awaited

I didn't give up,
I never asked why
Made up my mind
Not to cry

You were god's blessing
There was no doubt
God sent me a special one
And I was very proud

You were different
And so were we
Looking after you
Made us more caring

And we built a world,
With your giggles and laughs
Our life was gratified
And there were no gaps

Some steps I carried you
For some I supported
And I saw you walking on your own
My heart said "I knew, I knew"

I was so ecstatic
Seeing the progress graph

And suddenly a storm
No petals, only thorns
Anxious me, shattered
Begging for those moments
To re-live again
Not to go through igniting pain

Dead ………..
No!!! I don’t intend
To hear or see a nightmare
I can’t believe “Like this, it comes to an end”

No more excitement and naughty lies,
No more lovely voice,
No more facial cute gestures
No more buttering and tears

No more the laughs
No more calling out “Amma”
From you, my dear

Sure!! The life moves on
With a wound, never curable

He handed you to me and 
he called you back 
I am the one with empty lap
Just wanted to tell you be happy and well
My little angel please take care!!

-Just tried to capture her mother's heart

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Life... I am Happy and content !! Really No Issues :)

One of my friends told me to suggest some songs...n I started checking songs on youtube. Obviously the weightage was given to those songs of youth...which might not be heard everyday...The songs which accompanied the rosy dreams, the cozy winter nights, the nights when I slept with a broken heart for the endless crush list...Songs like "Piya basanti re, Kaahe sataaye aaja" brought smile on my face. It was the age I heard "Pehla Nasha", "Aur Ahista kijiye baate, dhadkane koi sun raha hoga" and dreamt of a Prince Charming to appear in future. It was the bubbly age when I dreamt of the prince charming as the perfect one and actually planned to run away with him-(just for the excitement sake) "Aasmaani rang hai aasmani aankhon ka" video was the perfect I suppose..Lyrics by Gulzaarji, made the song more heavenly. "seekho na naino ki bhasha piya" have its own magic...It depicts the silent love...the perfection in it with all those little nauk-jhok. 

I made poems and four-liners inspired by these songs...I sang them all day long when I used to be alone, I tried ball dance on them , turning the volume full on radio or TV. That was the age when I swayed with the wind...I smelled the raatraani next to window and blushed for no good reason. I was silent, but the world within me was not- it sang, it danced on "Baawra mann dekhne chala ek sapna".  Even when I was tired, I listened to these songs and stayed up till late nights, these were a good break from studies, and the best stage for my dreams to perform on "Sanu ek pal chain na aawe" or "piya re piya re", "Afreen".

At that time, clouds were swings, & rainbow was the slide..And the giant sky appeared to be the best garden for my dreams. I was here, but my dreams have traveled from the regions of Maharashtra to cities in India, to countries elsewhere in the world, and beyond it. I stayed awake accompanying the dark nights listening "Chandani raaten..., sab jag soye, hum jaage, taaron se karen baaten...".

Not forgetting to mention Gazals which dip my heart in deep oceans in those darkest nights, music created such magic that I went overseas to build my house on the waves, where the wind were walls, and sea held my house in its arms and I sang with the chirping birds- "Tumko dekha to yeh khayaal aaya, zindagi dhoop tum ghana saaya", "Kiska chehra ab me dekhu, tera chehra dekhkar, meri aankhon ne chuna hai tujhko duniya dekhkar"...Got inspired by different romantic novels, where hero stole my heart and I had ideal picture for my hero, though I never expected him to be the perfect one...however he was, he was perfect for me !! And whenever I thought of him, I felt like humming "kahin-kahin se har chehra tum jaisa lagta hai, tuko bhul na payenge hum aisa lagta hai" or "badi naazuk hai yeh manzil, mohobbat ka safar hai"

"Jab saamne tum aa jaate ho, kya jaaniya kya ho jaata hai..kuch mil jaata hai, kuch kho jaata hai", I dreamt of being away from home and seeing the world...missing my home and singing "ne majsi ne parat matrubhumi la"...And visiting Andamaan-Nikobar, seeing where our history took place, witnessing at least the places where they fought...loved the song by Sonu Nigam- "maaye rang de basanti chola maaye rang de" and A R Rehman's Maa tujhe Salaam ...It kind of ignited the Fire of being a citizen, doing something for this country. (Rang de Basanti contributed to it later on) Pride and Love for my country- It made me take a decision that in Future, wherever I will be, I would love to come back and sleep in the lap of my motherland.

 Music created potraits for anything to everything- I don't recall seeing Rajstaani vocalist singing "Kesariya Baalam padhaaro mare des". But I have heard a friend desribing the scenario. When I close my eyes while listening this one tune, I can imagine how beautiful it would be to see them performing this song in sand dunes during a sunset.

Music has no language... It conveys the language of heart, music has no boundaries. Each culture produces some spellbinding tones. At times, the awesome music touches one's soul and then one doesn't need words, music speaks...In others, some melodies are written in a way that one's touched, you can never forget the words "aanewala pal jaanewala hai", "mera kuch samaan tumhare paas pada hai", "Zindagi ke safar me bichad jaate hai jo makaam, wo fir nahi aate", "na jaane kyun aisa hota hai zindagi ke saath", "Kisi ki muskuraahton pe ho nisaar", "Ehsaan tera hoga mujh par", "Hoton se chulo tum", "Tere bina zindagi se koi shikwa to nahi",
"Tujhse naraaz nahin zindagi", "Tera mujhse hai pehle ka naata koi","Kabhi kabhi mere dil me khayaal aata hai", "Tere mere milan ki ye raina", "Teri bindiya re","yaara silli silli", "Morni baaga me bole aadhi raat ma"...all these and many more (The list is huge) take me to a different level...where I don't care who I am, who others are, I am just ME !! I am not in this world...I am in my world...

With age, the songs changed, but I never hated or despised any of my choice of songs, I would just say with age, I got more vulnerable to different kind of tunes, melodies, instrumentals, and I enjoy them all...

In marathi there are songs like "Sang sang bholanath paaus padel kaay" or "Ye re ye re pausa tula deto paisa"
which children sing in rains, but look at the variety of cultural music where they also have songs for youth- Premaat budleli tarunaai- Prem fakt maansavar kela jaat nahi te kashaavar hi hota, vaagnyavar, zaadanvar, fala-fulanvar, pranyan-pakshyanvar, aani ho- Jagnyavar !! "Hya janmavar, hya jagnyavar shatda prem karaave" asa mhanatana "Gaarva" aathvato- Nisargachya premaat padleli mi hya chaar olit parat punha tevhasarkhich harvun jaate-

उन जरा जास्तच आहे, दर वर्षी वाटत
भर ऊनात पाउस घेवून आभाळ मना दाटत
तरी  पाउले चालत  रहातात, मन चालत नाही
घामाशिवाय शरिरामधे कुणीच बोलत नाही 
(तितक्यात कुठून एक धग सूर्यासमोर येतो) - 2
उन्हामधील  काही  भाग पंखाखाली घेतो 
वारा उनाड मुलासारखा सैरा वैरा पळत राहतो
पाना फूल zaadanvarti छपरावर्ती चढून पाहतो 
दुपार तलून संध्याकलचा सुरु होतो पुन्हा खेळ
उन्हा मागुन चालत येते गार गार कातरवे
चकया डोळ्यांसमोर रुतु कुस बदलून घेतो 
पावसा आधी गांमधे कुठून गारवा येतो 





Monday, May 16, 2011

Dhobi Ghaat


Overwhelmed by the make, as I came out of theatre, I thought, ‘and there you go with one more hit film of Aamir Khan.’ Not that I am biased or anything. But as my parents did not like it, they kept asking why did I like it, what was so special about it?
From their point of view, it was just a slow-moving clip, which went on for 1 and a half hour. They thought it was illogical and impractical. More than that, they thought that it was as if just a sequence of pictures or clips, completely meaningless.
And I really loved it. Then I wondered why?? Why did I like it so much? Is it because my dear pal liked it and did I believe that I would also. No, that’s not the reason. Yeah I rely on her opinion, but it’s more than that. It’s about why she also liked it.
I thought why, and I just got the answer:
The small-small things it is made out of. The small and simple things. Beauty in simplicity.
Thousand normal moods which you and I experience in everyday life and infinite thoughts we experience but might not share in every day situation. The dreams and the way to it. Emotions rule over reality, reality rules over responsibility, and finally responsibility takes over everything. In psychology, we have learnt the concept of Fight -or- Flight response, which basically states that either you fight with situations or you run away (take a flight). And the movie persuaded the crowd in astonishing manner. When we have to confront what we can’t face, we generally try to avoid it. The feelings of jealousy, feeling of helplessness, realization of reality, love and understanding the meaning of love. The innocence killed by cheating and hence flight response.

The movie is a slap on those faces, who think that the end has to be happy and sugar sweet. It just pushes your imagination little further….
The feel of old Mumbai, the classic photography and the difference points out what is missing in today’s life. As they said, it’s race with the time. It is as if we want to see who finishes work first. Everyone just keeps running.
I think these are enough to fall in love with it, aren’t they? If not, all these reasons surely justify that the movie is worth a watch …Go, feel and experience…. Get out of comfort zone of happiness everywhere …it’s all about reality after all!!

-         

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Solitude

And he started walking, giving no hope to return back. I broke down as she saw his moving figure fading away. I have never felt so inadequate till now. I could feel the hollowness in my heart. I wanted to greet "good-bye" happily if this was the last time. Yes, I stayed awake whole night convincing myself the same. Then why couldn't I?? why couldn't I stop the tears? When I decided to speak, why couldn't I open my mouth? I felt as if suddenly blurry clouds covered clear sky and there was heavy rainfall. 

I knew this was not the time to cry, it was the time to try to let him know how much I love him, it was the last chance before I gave up. I didn't want to, but had left with no alternatives. It had been discussed over and over again always ending in futile conclusions. Then why should I?? But the mind was not ready to get over it..My mind said ..."one last try!! If it's the last then it has to be the best!!"

And I agreed. If it was for me, I never wanted it to be. I was stronger now, stronger than what I was when he met me. Yeah, I could bare it if it was a "No". But I never wanted him to go, go away like this, thinking that it would stop the occurance of these situations. He thought he never matched me, I deserved someone better. I decided that he was the best. I was mesmerized to know that I have fallen for him too. But then it was the fact which could not be expressed in words however much I tried. 

If I would have not met him, I would not have been what I am today. So confident, self-reliant, determined, focused and if this was not enough, then he also taught me to move on. Just because of him, I have moved on. Broken as I was, could not even find any hope in any thing. He gave me a new perspective to look at; he taught me to breathe same air in fresh ways. He moved on with me, holding my fingers as if a baby's, without letting me realize that it was a deliberate effort. He walked along, so the journey seemed easy; distance crossed, seemed short. 

I don't know how I got attached to him. I don't know how I got used to him, his habits, his existance around me. Now that he was about to leave, I couldn't live with the fact anymore. It was not out of need. Human relationships are formed out of need, I know. But this was something more. I was not scared that when I will need him, he wouldn't be there. I was scared that I just didn't want to lose him. He was such a gem of a person. Forget about my feelings..

Now that I think I wonder why did he help me come out of what I went through? If we say human relationships are formed out of need, then this is an exception in his case, isn't it? What did he get by helping me? Nothing, now that I have fallen for him, he is running away. As if I tried to return his favor. What he did for me, could it be out of love? Who can say what was in his mind? I just knew the fact that he did everything for me, which made me feel so good, so nice. Its the princess kind of feeling every girl wants to experience. He treated me like one. Then why can't I love him? Isn't it justified? I don't even need his permission to love him. But who will tell him all this. Who will ask him to stay?? It was me. As I couldn't see his figure anymore, I was back in reality. I could't decide what to do, and one voice said, "run."  I ran promptly, forgetting everything else. Only one thing I reckoned "He had to stay!!"